You are a Gift to Me...

sometimes we run faster than impatience, and when we slow

slightly,

it slams into our back, knocks us down, and stands on us... stomping on us

in a dance

with arms raised victorious over our better judgement.

But stand good girl,

but stand, and brush off the now fluttering arms of impatience,

brush them from your face and look....and see....and breathe

....and then smile.

You've learned a trick! why you can teach an old dog new tricks!

Be kind to yourself, yes, be kind to yourself.

The time of super sonic speed, and super woman deeds, and super over inflated emergencies is past.......

and it....

....sits in the dust that you,

you, have created.

face forward, love of my life, yes I love you,

face forward and experience each and every moment,

each and every moment.

A gift, this moment, this life

look inside and see me

tell you, "You are a gift...to me, and I love you."

I believe I have created the last of my dolls. thank God it was for Connie, the incredible woman in Texas who has more of my work than I do.

It's strange how your discontent or happiness affects me. I have a thin current of worry with your name on it
that flows alongside all the other worries
in my underground reservoir. I think,
at least in your case,
the worry revolves around unfulfilled creativity. But,
also,
I have an even larger stream
that flows
whose name is 'faith'. They intertwine
and flow together forever
over the edge of my visible horizon.
One balancing the other.
So love, be good, be happy, drive carefully,
and make me something pretty
from your heart.
love you, M

what is most precious in your life? what sits close to your heart? the warm from the proximity, the ease of the silence the touch, so sweet, but no touch needed. only the distance so small. The colors of close, of warm, of safe, of close your eyes I know how you feel, now rest. You are here you are near. Happy and Healthy New Year To All!! Mardene

Smoke Signals from 5000 feet

life altering changes seem to be the hallmark of this span in a human life.
in my life the alteration comes from my decision to move away from a place where I am isolated, to a place within the beating heart of a big city.
this month, the month of my 63rd birthday, I'm moving to a high rise apartment in Denver. Where I can immerse
myself in the pulsing life at ground level, or climb to the top where I'll have a 360 degree view 5000 feet above sea level and ten stories up.
my goal is to develop an environment where I can write about things, people, places as seen from my own eyes, mind and heart.
soon I will be sending up smoke signals from the inner most ring of Denver.
I'm going with low expectations because I hate to be disappointed, and betrayal of any sort leaves a very bad, vinegary taste in my mouth... no betrayal or disappointment allowed. only new experiences, a full and functioning imagination, and hugs; lots and lots of touching. when I realized that I am never touched, and I never touch anyone, a sense of urgency pushed me to this decision. without the touch of human skin, and human interaction I was wilting like a flower deprived of water and sunlight.
and so, for me, another change in direction.

Tired

I am so tired. My job is kicking my butt. I used to be so strong and powerful. now, not so much.
I have a question: how do you think you would feel if there was NO ONE in your life who called you 'honey', or 'precious', or 'sweetheart' ? .......just something to think about.

Someone let the CAT out of the bag.......

there was one time when I allowed my outrage at mis-treatment to explode with the force that Amy allows....I had, for all intents and purposes lost my mind, and when my precious son walked in the room after spending the day with the 'perp' of this anecdote, a howl issued forth from my mouth the likes of which had never... been heard before, I grabbed the nearest object ( a five pound weight) and threw it at my son. Thank God I am a lousy pitcher, I missed him by 2 feet and the resultant hole in the wall stayed there to remind me to NEVER let that animal out ever again. Good? Bad?? What??