my President!

well, I don't know who sent you this, but not only do I take it personally, I am sure that this person did not vote for President Obama. The light at the end of the tunnel I peer through may have a slightly gilded, rosy tint, but it most assuredly is still lit, brighter than it's been in years. The economic problems were caused by greed. Greed and illiteracy. Plain and simple. It'll take a massive overhaul of the moral climate as well as the educational system for Americans to implement a true and real turnaround. Or maybe a plague of locusts that only have a taste for people with no respect for his or her fellow human. The economic climate is taking care of itself, the moral climate is a whole 'nother ballgame.

pes-uh-miz-uhm

pessimism- [pes-uh-miz-uhm]

1.
the tendency to see, anticipate, or emphasize only bad or undesirable outcomes, results, conditions, problems, etc.: His pessimism about the future of our country depresses me.

Yes, you, my favorite newscasters for more than ten years are so pessimistic that I find myself switching to CBS.

Yes, America has problems; we know this, it's not news. Can we please hear some talk about how we as a nation are going about fixing the problems?

Yes, there are problems of a financial nature, serious, life threatening problems concerning the environment, problems concerning absent parents and their resultant out of control, uneducated, immoral children who are cruel and pessimistic.

Talk to me of the plans for renewal, the plans for solvency, for guidance and education of the children. I want to hear that we are all in this boat together, and that the new captain is young, energetic, optimistic, educated, and knows how to fix the mess he has inherited. All we need to do is listen to him, trust him, and do what we know how to do best; survive.

The dour predictions, the dour expressions (do you watch yourselves?), the less than enthusiastic faith in your fellow Americans to pull themselves up and keep swinging away is almost criminal. You know people listen to you, trust you, look to you for guidance and direction. And what do they get? PESSIMISM.

Am I expecting too much to want to hear on my newscast that we will get beyond this...as always...and come out on the other side better, smarter, kinder, more compassionate; filled with ideas, filled with laughter, filled with hope?

Seriously, listening to you causes my abdominal muscles to clench.

I wish for you happiness, prosperity, the love of a child, good food to eat, clean air to breathe, a soft bed to sleep in, a warm hand to hold.

ah Israel, gorgeous, golden land! The land where the people of the Jewish faith can go and finally feel safe. Where industry and perseverence are the hallmark of the people. Where education of the people is paramount, and the minds and hearts of the children are nurtured with joy and love. Where a shining, strong nation rose up through the hands and hearts of a people so strong that NOTHING could totally extinguish the flaming will to live that is in the hearts of all Jews....ALL JEWS...all over the world. WE stand and cheer and pray and send our love across the land to you, to those who make a stand and protect a country brought forth from the sand and heat and broken hearts. Be strong, protect what you have created! Be proud, and rest assured that some day, yes, some day there will come a total reckoning, and all humanity will take a step back and see you for what you are; a land of the free, a home of the brave. Shalom

bloody hell.

first, I want to apologize to you for instilling in you, and your sister and brother, this burning need to question everything. In some situations this is a good quality, but when applied to EVERYTHING it definitely engenders a good bit of anxiety. I do this to myself. There's something else I do to myself that I can't quite parse out yet, but it causes heaps of anxiety. I have way too much time to think. I try to circumvent this 'thinking' thing by reading alot, but not with doing stuff. Stuff that I know for sure, when I'm doing it, makes me so creatively satisfied. I don't yet understand why I veer off and avoid doing these things. It's like there's something in my brain that acts like the Berlin wall. We all know life would be so much better if it was gone, but it stubbornly, illogically still exists.

ok, that said, questioning my desire to have a wireless connection is actually a good thing. I don't know why I want it. yes, I have a cable and phone wire trailing down the hallway, so what. it's almost as though I look for something to drag my time and attention away from things that would bring me so much more satisfaction. I don't know, it's all procrastination methods honed to a fine point. I just don't know why I can't get past or even around this blockade.

Ad eundum quo nemo ante iit
To boldly go where no man has gone before
From: Jenine Abarbanel To: Mardene Abarbanell Sent: Tuesday, November 18, 2008 11:31:45 PMSubject: wireless routerhttp://www.amazon.com/Linksys-WRT54G2-Wireless-G-Broadband-Router/dp/B0014J07R2/ref=dp_cp_ob_e_title_0?ie=UTF8&qid=1227076050&sr=8-30that will work.so, what happened to the airport express? it just stopped working with your machine? why do you want a wireless router anyway? you've only got one computer, you always use it in the same place, and you've got a phone jack out in the living room, right? or...do you? no, that jack doesn't work, does it. so you've been dragging the ethernet cable into the living room? is that too hard? what's the deal?j.

please let me know if you need.....

the girls are waiting to hear from you.

the election.

it occurred to me this evening, while watching this election, that an enormous quantity of life changing events have populated my life. and it also occurs to me that all of these events are fodder for....drum roll....stories!!! yes. what else was happening when these BIG things were happening? uh huh. you go girl...as soon as the pain is medicated away.